
SMILES
DreamTime Log
Original Transcripts with little commentary (with more to come)
FALSE AWAKENINGS
7/12/94
Took Steve (Mizrach) to airport so I was up early. Returned
from airport and went back to sleep. Sitting in bed I'm suddenly slurping
the honey-dewed crotch of a beautiful woman; my arms & legs entwined
with her in a loving/lusty embrace, but flashing back to my bedroom where
I lay clutching my pillow-shifting from "reality" to dreamtime, yet visions
of "reality" room space and "dream" room space are only slightly different-nearly
identical perspectives.
Back in "reality" I notice that my bedroom door is opening
to reveal Sean and Steve (Romano) standing in my doorway and for a brief
instant I am embarrassed at the possibility of them witnessing this intimate
moment in BOTH Reality and DreamTime! AND THEN. . .
I seem to get up and go out of my bedroom into my office/living
room where loud light and sound is beckoning there are dark-skinned short-people
ALL OVER my office..... sorta harrassing me as I go downstairs in search
of Sean. I go out his front door to find him sitting on a car under the
tree in the driveway. The garage door is open & despite the evident
commotion all around I proceed to sit and tell Sean about all the friggin
people up stairs. He grunts in the direction of the yard: construction
is occuring and a strange stairwell is stark against our old house. I inspect
the interior and the changes are quite odd.
Then I believe I "woke up" AGAIN and went downstairs/outside
to tell someone and I'm in the yard. The other property was a patio/coffee
cafe thing with a little astro-turf green area. I'm then standing abreast
with two women. One I embrace as my lover ( the other is my daughter?).
My anima/soul mate and I move into my house which inside is open like our
old deaf friend's multi-leveled interiored house (which is geographicly
less than a mile away as the crow flys). As we continue to embrace we tumble
into a soft love-seat and I then TRULY awaken . . . . -this morning!
SLEEP PARALYSIS
4/20/96
Well... this morning I had some of the most intense sleep
paralysis ever.... and I can begin to see how a powerful modern mythos
like THE ALIEN GREY CONSPIRACY could cause one to see this event as possibly
related.
Basicly I woke up after only three hours of sleep at
K's apartment-drove the 5-10 minute drive to my shack in the woods. I went
directly back to bed and had three 'partial-awakenings' that were accompanied
by terrific paralysis! I had just 'been in the dreamtime' when I found
my consciousness back in my bed at home but my body was deadened and I
could not sit up for the life of me. No matter how I tried I could not
lift my chest and head. The paralysis was broken when I tried to move my
extremities ever so slighting but gradually more. This happened this morning
on what felt like 3 different occassions. One time my knees seemed to be
the first thing I could move, another time (or two) my hands. I have read
a little which seems to show this as typical. When 'conscious' and paralyzed
I felt that whatever my previous dream had been it had some connection.
I don't recall the dreams I had. They did seem rather interesting as far
as confronting one's fears goes. I think they are dreams I had after the
paralysis.
While paralyzed I got the distinct impression that, despite
how badly my body/mind wanted to just 'fall back into that dark abyss of
deep sleep,' something very bad might happen to me if I didn't fight it.
'Unconscious' fear of the jungian other or collective unconscious as shadow?
Nearly all of my adult hood false awakenings have followed
realtime false awakenings, ie- after I've been roused but then go back
to sleep within 5 or 10 minutes. I've read that one of the aspects of
lucid dream periods is the commonness of waking and going back to sleep
both in realtime and dreamtime.
The relation of sleep paralysis to false awakenings seems
important. The only other recent sleep paralysis encounter was back at
my Oxofrd Ave home. It involved the sensation of a yellow light coming
from the hall thru my bedroom door which was opening as if someone (or
thing) were pushing it open. Once again the sensation of numbness (though
not to the degree of this morning's events) persisted until I "ROLLED"
my body out of it and over, off my side, to 'see the door.' I believe the
spell was broken but briefly before I fell back to sleep. During this incredibly
brief event I thought of the abducting alien grey scenario that might be
unfolding. But all of these sleep paralysis events are short and within
that fantastic excluded middle that can be easily forgotten without a little
conscious intent to remember.
(Could this have something to do with the new research
linking WAKING experience of the THETA brain wave state in "mystics", ie-people
claiming to see and/or converse with apparitions/spirits? Theta is also
associated with PK experiments from around the globe! What if we all really
ARE creating the world's events, ala Jeff Lewis, thru our dreaming selves'
theta energies?!? What if we could free our minds of the programmed dream
circuits of JL's Biblical Apocalypse Programming?)
Are our confrontations with these new/old states frightening
because of our typical xenophobic autoimmune system genetic wiring? I have
thought this as possible before in regards to the abduction experience
as traumatic for our societies lack of experience with these altered states
but can see them as possibly beneficial for our protection. "What if they
really do suck yer soul when you go into the light?"
"They Live
We Sleep"
WAKE UP !!!